In which I get very real with you, dear audience. Miscarriage is something that never is spoken of but which, I think, needs to be shared so that others know they are not alone. This is our story. This is Mercy's story.
Thank you for sharing this. It’s very hard, I know. I am a part of that silent community. Um… twice. It happened twice in a row with me. After we had two boys, we wanted a girl, of course. Missed abortion. A lot like your case, but my doctor was hoping it’s a tech glitch or something, because my tests showed normal progress. I guess my body didn’t know yet. I called it My Ghost baby. I carried her all summer. Then the bleeding began. A year later we tried again. This time it was more devastating. The little one had a heartbeat. A couple weeks later - bleeding. No heartbeat. It felt like my whole body was crying.
Stay strong, put everything in God’s hands. All your grief, pain and hopes. Nothing is unseen to Him. Six years later I had a healthy girl. Yes, there was bleeding again, but this time she was safe. And two years after we had another girl. God never leaves us empty-handed. And yeah, pregnancy at 35 here is considered a high-risk pregnancy, millions of weird tests and close monitoring.
I lost my first child, Michael Owen, at the very end of my pregnancy. If I can offer some solace and encouragement... It's to grieve in your own way, no matter what. Our society, as a rule, is awful about handling death and grieving, and people get opinionated about it. Take what it helpful and discard the rest without guilt. It is OK to be angry, it's OK to be heartbroken, it's OK to be the thousand other emotions we feel when we are faced with a loss like this. It's OK, even if this is not okay.
After Michael went home to Jesus, God blessed me with two beautiful boys. Rainbows tend to show up after intense storms. ❤️
I'm proud of you for sharing. Hang in there. If you want to talk, send me a message. I mean it (so many people don't).
Sweet friend, thank you for sharing. You and Brad will be in our prayers. We miscarried our first, in April of 2020, also a missed miscarriage. Never saw a heartbeat and uncertain if there ever was one.
She was a blessing. I am adding you and your husband to my prayers, friend. I'm so sorry for this to have happened to you.
I'm glad you were able to bring Mercy home with you and have a funeral. The small service with our Ordinariate priest was what kept me together when I had my first miscarriage. (I've had two early losses; everyone under fifty really does come out of the woodwork if you bring up the subject!) I was with a large university hospital at the time and no one there ever treated our baby as a person who had been alive, so it was important to me that he be seen somehow. Thank you for sharing your story, for her, and for you. You also deserve to be acknowledged as a mother.
Thank you for sharing. I know soooo many women who have experienced this, and it is always heart-wrenching to hear their stories. But I do think they need to be told, according to the comfort level of the woman. I'm so glad you were able to honor Mercy, and I will keep you and your husband in my prayers.
On a side note, a few comments you mentioned point to my belief that women's healthcare is broken. Pregnant women aren't listened to or trusted, they are often given outdated or weak evidence, and treated like children. Separate rant, I know, and I know in your case there was most likely nothing that could've been done, but something does seriously need to change.
Thank you so much for sharing this, and I’m so sorry you had to experience it. Though it’s heartbreaking, this is such a beautiful reflection.
We miscarried our first at 11 weeks, and in many ways the experience was overly medicalized and depersonalizing, especially for our baby, whose remains we never got to see. If you struggle with fear and anxiety in any future pregnancies, please don’t hesitate to seek professional counseling if you’re able. I did not, and, though my first full-term pregnancy was physically healthy, the overwhelming fear of another loss stole much of the joy of those months.
I’ll keep you and your husband in my prayers, both for healing and for healthy future pregnancies. ❤️
I am very sorry for your loss. That is a grief I have not known, though I've known others.
I pray it has been/will continue to be healing for you to talk about, write about and acknowledge the brief life of your baby Mercy. Blessings to you and yours.
Thank you for describing the indescribable and for your witness. It's heartbreaking and beautiful. God bless you, Mercy Ann, Brad, and your future family for which I pray.
I I’ve never been pregnant (that I know of) and never will now but you had me in tears. I’ve a cousin who lost her first and every year, on his anniversary she shared about him. I am so incredibly sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry for your loss. August 13 is my own birthday, and it is an honour to share it with your sweet baby daughter. My prayers are with you and your husband during this unimaginably difficult time.
Love for you, Linton; I have walked this Dark Valley - as have many women in my family . We share a common grief, of infertility and heartache. But so few talk of it...
When I wrote my book, my main character suffers an early miscarriage; but she is the survivor of multiple miscarriages, as am I. When I finished the scene, I lay down for days and wept, for I had never known how to put into word this loss, until now. The words must be spoken; so let the tears flow -
your Sisters in Sorrow join you, Walking the Dark Valley, arm in arm with Angels.
Thank you so much for sharing, and I will pray for you in your grief. And the name you picked is beautiful - we lost a little one last November and named her Stella Mercy.
SL, I’m so sorry. One time I asked a friend whose wife was expecting a baby if he felt anything different with this new soul about them. I don’t think she was showing at the time. He said he felt the baby’s presence in the room. I hope Mercy is present to you, I pray God gives you this gift, to comfort you and your husband and your family throughout your whole lives until you see her again. (Lord, please, in Your Mercy, grant this! Amen.🔥)
Thank you for sharing this. It’s very hard, I know. I am a part of that silent community. Um… twice. It happened twice in a row with me. After we had two boys, we wanted a girl, of course. Missed abortion. A lot like your case, but my doctor was hoping it’s a tech glitch or something, because my tests showed normal progress. I guess my body didn’t know yet. I called it My Ghost baby. I carried her all summer. Then the bleeding began. A year later we tried again. This time it was more devastating. The little one had a heartbeat. A couple weeks later - bleeding. No heartbeat. It felt like my whole body was crying.
Stay strong, put everything in God’s hands. All your grief, pain and hopes. Nothing is unseen to Him. Six years later I had a healthy girl. Yes, there was bleeding again, but this time she was safe. And two years after we had another girl. God never leaves us empty-handed. And yeah, pregnancy at 35 here is considered a high-risk pregnancy, millions of weird tests and close monitoring.
Thank you for the encouragement.
I have no magic words, but you are in my prayers.
Thank you!
Praying for comfort for you and your husband 🙏
Oh, I am so, so sorry.
Mercy is a beautiful name. ❤️
I lost my first child, Michael Owen, at the very end of my pregnancy. If I can offer some solace and encouragement... It's to grieve in your own way, no matter what. Our society, as a rule, is awful about handling death and grieving, and people get opinionated about it. Take what it helpful and discard the rest without guilt. It is OK to be angry, it's OK to be heartbroken, it's OK to be the thousand other emotions we feel when we are faced with a loss like this. It's OK, even if this is not okay.
After Michael went home to Jesus, God blessed me with two beautiful boys. Rainbows tend to show up after intense storms. ❤️
I'm proud of you for sharing. Hang in there. If you want to talk, send me a message. I mean it (so many people don't).
Sweet friend, thank you for sharing. You and Brad will be in our prayers. We miscarried our first, in April of 2020, also a missed miscarriage. Never saw a heartbeat and uncertain if there ever was one.
She was a blessing. I am adding you and your husband to my prayers, friend. I'm so sorry for this to have happened to you.
I'm glad you were able to bring Mercy home with you and have a funeral. The small service with our Ordinariate priest was what kept me together when I had my first miscarriage. (I've had two early losses; everyone under fifty really does come out of the woodwork if you bring up the subject!) I was with a large university hospital at the time and no one there ever treated our baby as a person who had been alive, so it was important to me that he be seen somehow. Thank you for sharing your story, for her, and for you. You also deserve to be acknowledged as a mother.
Thank you. And I am so sorry you and your baby were treated that way.
Thank you for sharing. I know soooo many women who have experienced this, and it is always heart-wrenching to hear their stories. But I do think they need to be told, according to the comfort level of the woman. I'm so glad you were able to honor Mercy, and I will keep you and your husband in my prayers.
On a side note, a few comments you mentioned point to my belief that women's healthcare is broken. Pregnant women aren't listened to or trusted, they are often given outdated or weak evidence, and treated like children. Separate rant, I know, and I know in your case there was most likely nothing that could've been done, but something does seriously need to change.
Thank you. And our healthcare system is broken all around!
Thank you so much for sharing this, and I’m so sorry you had to experience it. Though it’s heartbreaking, this is such a beautiful reflection.
We miscarried our first at 11 weeks, and in many ways the experience was overly medicalized and depersonalizing, especially for our baby, whose remains we never got to see. If you struggle with fear and anxiety in any future pregnancies, please don’t hesitate to seek professional counseling if you’re able. I did not, and, though my first full-term pregnancy was physically healthy, the overwhelming fear of another loss stole much of the joy of those months.
I’ll keep you and your husband in my prayers, both for healing and for healthy future pregnancies. ❤️
Thank you! I will definitely seek help if need.
I am very sorry for your loss. That is a grief I have not known, though I've known others.
I pray it has been/will continue to be healing for you to talk about, write about and acknowledge the brief life of your baby Mercy. Blessings to you and yours.
So, so sorry to hear this. Prayers for you both.
Thank you for describing the indescribable and for your witness. It's heartbreaking and beautiful. God bless you, Mercy Ann, Brad, and your future family for which I pray.
I I’ve never been pregnant (that I know of) and never will now but you had me in tears. I’ve a cousin who lost her first and every year, on his anniversary she shared about him. I am so incredibly sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry for your loss. August 13 is my own birthday, and it is an honour to share it with your sweet baby daughter. My prayers are with you and your husband during this unimaginably difficult time.
Love for you, Linton; I have walked this Dark Valley - as have many women in my family . We share a common grief, of infertility and heartache. But so few talk of it...
When I wrote my book, my main character suffers an early miscarriage; but she is the survivor of multiple miscarriages, as am I. When I finished the scene, I lay down for days and wept, for I had never known how to put into word this loss, until now. The words must be spoken; so let the tears flow -
your Sisters in Sorrow join you, Walking the Dark Valley, arm in arm with Angels.
Thank you so much for sharing, and I will pray for you in your grief. And the name you picked is beautiful - we lost a little one last November and named her Stella Mercy.
SL, I’m so sorry. One time I asked a friend whose wife was expecting a baby if he felt anything different with this new soul about them. I don’t think she was showing at the time. He said he felt the baby’s presence in the room. I hope Mercy is present to you, I pray God gives you this gift, to comfort you and your husband and your family throughout your whole lives until you see her again. (Lord, please, in Your Mercy, grant this! Amen.🔥)